...passed over...

uh, I know its an easy pun

(tis a tradition in the joke

of the reformed)

Call me Moshe

call me

...dizzy deck...

I asked them

was I really out?

Someone said

"hell yeah, hell fucking yeah."

Class dismissed.

...this is...

this is a fire:

it will end things.

Oxygen, for instance.


this is a nightmare:

it will fake endings.

Falling, for example.


this is codery:

this yes when no is meant.

Closing it all in.


this is open:

it will stay open:

Hoping, and such.

...minus...

2

minus

1

leaves

2

lonely

1s

...bullets over Bloomfield...

one shot after another

you kept firing

but at least the aim

was true

It's just a shame

you know

each one pierces

the other

as if no one

were even standing

in front of you

as if you never

even took aim

(I'm afraid to

know what else

you have hiding

in that chamber)

...return to sender...

this is what I have learned:

that the heart is more

powerful than the brain.

Think about all the innate

services of the heart:

blood flow and pressure

pumping and palpitating.

The message sent

from the brain is that

something is not right,

that someone is not able

to use the beat the same way we

are. This fear that the message

does not get sent.

But, this is thegreatest

fear: endings,

of poems, lives,

pulses, us.

this is the worst

feeling I have

ever had

...just Hackensack...

do they drive

faster because

this is a hospital parking lot

or is it

that this is

just HackensacK?

Why are there

so many nicer

places in the world

and why

oh why did Billy Joel

have to be right

this one time?

(this only encourages him)

...no right turn...

I don't like leaving

you there in the glass

tunnel taking turns

at watching each of us

walk away in the reflections

on the brown glass tint


I told you that this part

was the hardest

and you told me

that nothing


nothing

is as hard

as this

(and you were right)

...the light above the bed...

glows down on your head

shining through the silvers

in your hair and then

back through the tubing

and into your lungs

shining and open

accepting the glow

as if it were oxygen

as if it were the only

thing we needed

to keep us alive

...bellyaching...

it was either

something I said

or something I ate

(probably the former

as is common

as of late)

...easier than breathing...

there is nothing

easy about taking a deep

breath and slowing

down the world around

you but you try and try

and puff and puff

until it becomes easier

to feel relief and solace

in knowing the world

around you you created

...2:39 in the morning...

we can't do this:

no matter where we are:

we can be here:

instantaneously:

if necessary:

and if something did:

go wrong:

we wouldn't be notified:

because nobody knows:

we're here:

we're here:

but it is useless:

we might as well:

be at home:

ready to spring:

to attention:

to the upright:

position:

of the rest:

who walk with us:

at 2:39 in the morning:

if necessary:

...prayer and praise...

the softest side of the skin is unseen

the last wisp of hair glimmers without the sun

foreseen only in the distant detail

we look closer and closer at the clock

and hope it will stay still

no arm moving forward

or back to a false belief

but right here

and seemingly now

this will all be part of the cycle

just like the dismissal of cells

that appear as skin

when we fold our hands together

we pray that they cannot ever

separate or lose the other

this is not what we get

when we praise one another

when it is undue

this is what we get

when we finally get

what it is

that takes us over

...scurry...

are these squirrels

in my ceiling

or in my head

or is my head

the ceiling

I am thinking of?

...to rest...

the shrouded

to rest

eternally

in the warmth

of the soil

and in the warmth

of the wife's return

to the husband

like the child

to the womb

or the lover

to the embrace.





(in memory of Ann Nagel)

...2/22/08...

at long last

we have white

and piles of it

and prior to

the plow's first

salt and pepper

mow the dog

is pouncing around

like a mini-horse

and naturally

without a change

in aperture

or setting

or lighting

we have the perfect

contrast:

black black dog

on white white snow

(shutter closing

slow)

...illness in flux...

with each wave

you go in and out

of real and unreal

and question the nightmare

as if it were actual



that fear in your eyes

is the fear in your head

and that fever that

comes and goes

is as real as the needle



that they use to settle

the stomach or spasm

this illness in flux

and will be for a few

more days

...like everyday...

I love you

and miss

you so much

it hurts

to say

I love you

and miss

you so much

...miss piggy...

you used to

call yourself

miss piggy


everytime

you belched

while playing


scrabble

and tallied

triple word score


I need

miss piggy

back today


a belch

is a sign

of satiation


that's all any

of us wants

right now